Let's String Some Pearls

Have you ever made your own jewelry? If you are familiar with beading, you know that to make a beautiful necklace, you must start with some wire, a clasp, a few basic tools and a bunch of loose beads.

Where to Begin?

It takes time to select the beads you want and organize them into a pattern before stringing them one by one.  And if the beads are exceptionally small like seed beads tend to be, it can be a tedious process. But over time and with practice, a beautiful piece of jewelry is formed. You've created something new, one of a kind, unique.  And then it happens, that moment arrives when you tie off the end and fasten your new piece of jewelry around your neck. You gaze into the mirror. At first you just look at it. You pause and take it all in. But then you may start to analyze it. Do the colors work? Is it the right length? Should I change the order of the beads? Is something missing? Or not needed? Am I content with how it turned out or should I try again?

May I suggest, abuse recovery is like making a priceless necklace. It takes time to find the right pieces. You dig through books, resources, scripture, and wise counsel searching for the foundational beads of your new life, the life God created you to live.

You pray, ask questions, seek answers and dream about a life without fear. Whether you choose to stay well or leave well, you begin gathering the beads to build a new life.  A life where you have a voice to express yourself in safety. A freedom to be yourself and discover God's perfect love that casts out all fear. Putting it Together...

As you sort through your experiences and recognize patterns of dysfunction, you are able to see more clearly and a small pile of precious beads begins to build. You recognize the core issues, the ways you've contributed to the unhealthy, toxic life you've lived. You begin to take ownership of your own choices. You fumble through setting your first healthy boundaries. You panic when you receive pushback from your husband. You question yourself again. And then search deeper for the precious beads of the Lord's courage, hope, love and strength. And just like making a beaded necklace for the first time, you are bound to make some mistakes along the way. You might drop a bead or two or even spill them all over the floor and have to pick them up one by one. You'll stumble in your beginning steps toward healthy living, but you'll brush yourself off, pick up the pieces and get back to work. As you learn and grow, developing what Leslie Vernick describes as CORE STRENGTH, you begin to see the progress you are making. Your sting of beads is growing. And as it is with jewelry making, if you don't like the way it is turning out, you can always restring the beads.

You have the freedom to keep recreating your necklace (and your life) until you are pleased with the results of your hard work and ready to clothe yourself with new strength and dignity.  

You will become whom the Lord created you to be. Not perfect, but perfectly beautiful. A treasured masterpiece handcrafted by the Lord Himself.

If you need some direction in your journey from frazzled to freedom, you may want to start with one of my favorite books. I've gained clarity and discovered many of the foundational pieces of my new life within their pages. If you haven't read it yet, may I suggest you begin with The Emotionally Destructive Marriage or check out Leslie Vernick's website. She has amazing insight and has been a tremendous blessing to me and thousands of others searching for answers.

You can do this! It's time to string some pearls.