Moving From Frazzled to Freedom
Annie's Reading List
Hi you,
When I was jolted awake and had to face the reality of my emotionally destructive marriage, I felt I was drowning in a stormy sea. Desperate for answers to so many questions, I flung myself into the quest for understanding.
Scouring the local library's shelves and searching online for books, articles, blogposts, anything that could help make sense of my wild thoughts and emotions, I read everything I could find.
Some things were helpful, others added more confusion. But a few stood apart as precious pearls of wisdom. And slowly, painful day after painful day, I began to grasp the truth I desperately needed.
My growing list of books and resources came out of those dark days. And they are still helping me navigate the storm. They offer a beacon of light shining through the darkest of nights and continue to help me set my feet down on solid ground.
If you feel lost at sea, I pray you find a LIGHTHOUSE of hope, an ANCHOR for your soul and HEALING for your heart.
May the Lord guide and direct each step of your journey.
Here's to Freedom,
Both Yours and Mine,
Annie
The Emotionally Destructive Marriage
How to Find Your Voice and Reclaim Your Hope
By Leslie Vernick
This book is a must for any woman who wonders if there is something wrong in her marriage. Reading The Emotionally Destructive Marriage opened my eyes to the truth I never had the strength to face before. With wisdom and candor, Leslie Vernick gently guides her readers through the fog of living with an angry and controlling man and shines the light of God's Word into the darkest corners of our hearts and homes. Whether you choose to stay well or leave well, this book helps you navigate the storm.
As the cover says, "You'll learn to identify damaging behaviors, gain skills to respond wisely, promote healthy change, stay safe, understand when, why, and even how to leave, and recognize that God see and hates what is happening to you.
Trying harder to be a perfect fantasy wife won't fix what's wrong with your marriage. Discover instead how you can initiate effective changes to stop the cycle of destruction and restore hope for the future."
Boundaries in Marriage
Understanding the Choices that Make or Break Loving Relationships
By Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend
This was the first book I read after my medical doctor suggested there was a serious problem with my marriage. I have to admit as I first began reading Boundaries in Marriage, the concepts taught by Dr. Cloud and Dr. Townsend were foreign to me and seemed downright wrong. But as I continued to read, asking the Lord to show me the truth, I came to the realization that my understanding of many scriptural principles was flawed. I desperately needed to apply the concepts of this book to my life. Setting healthy, God-honoring boundaries was essential for my survival. As I worked through Boundaries in Marriage and its companion workbook, I began making necessary changes. My relationship grew more difficult but my physical health began to improve. As I practiced setting boundaries, I became physically, emotionally and spiritually healthier than I'd ever been.
Never Go Back
10 things you'll never do again
By Dr. Henry Cloud
This one isn't about marriage: it's about all of life. Dr. Cloud's list of 10 things you'll never do again can be a life changer. It continues to be a source of healing for me. And it's true, I will Never Go Back to my old way of doing things.
As the back cover says, these ten principles "may seem simple on the outside, but implementing even one of these principles will change your life forever. You'll learn to act on simple life-shaping truths, such as...
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You can't please everyone.
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You can't change someone who doesn't want to change.
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Avoiding short-term discomfort is not worth losing long-term benefit.
Asking yourself why you are where you are can take you to a whole new place....Once you walk through these doorways of change, you'll find that you never want to go back."
Running on Empty
Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect
By. Jonice Webb, PhD with Christine Musello, PsyD
"This book is not about what happened to you as a child; it's about what failed to happen for you as a child. Psychologist Jonice Webb, PhD shows how Emotional Neglect in childhood has an insidious effect on us as adults, causing us to struggle with self-discipline and self-care. or to feel unworthy, disconnected, and unfulfilled."
Within the pages of this book, I finally understood my husband's seemingly crazy moods, his out-of-control behavior, and our wild, rollercoaster life together. And I could finally identify how his dysfunctional childhood continued to affect me and our children in profound ways.
This book not only explains how Emotional Neglect damages us but it also offers step-by-step guidance to heal and overcome it. Its a must read for anyone wanting to repair the damage of Emotional Neglect.
Women with Controlling Partners
Taking Back Your Life from a Manipulative or Abusive Partner
By. Carol A Lambert, MSW
A controlling or abusive partner can break even the strongest person—unless you know what to look for. Written by an expert in intimate partner abuse and based on her highly successful recovery program for women with controlling partners, this book will give you the strength, courage, and strategies you need to acknowledge the problem and stand up for yourself once and for all—whether you stay or leave the relationship.
Using the author’s three-stage recovery model, you’ll be empowered to move out of denial, deconstruct what holds you psychologically captive, and take back your life.
Abuse can be devastating, and having a controlling partner can make you feel crazy— as if you’re the one responsible. But you’re not crazy, and you’re not to blame! With this important, one-of-a-kind recovery process, you’ll finally find the clarity of mind, courage, and strength to protect yourself from the hurtful control that damages your mental and physical health, and move toward a safer and happier life.